Smokestacks and Pipe Bombs (Part III of IV)

I pull the lichen off my sack and throw it at the blonde one in Bananarama, and she quickly eats it. McDougal never lets the Bananarama girls eat on these kinds of trips and I feel bad, I usually hide fries and stuff in my pockets and sneak them when McD is asleep. She kind of grunts at me in appreciation.

"Okay Max, stop this car and let's find some drugs," he yells, even though the car is sitting quietly in a Denny's parking lot and my name is not Max.

"Will do," I say, and open what's left of the passenger door. We walk into Denny's, where people get shot all the time, and sit down in a sticky booth. I try to imagine what we must look like, McDougal with his He-Man costume and giant stuffed purple tiger, me completely nude. God, how did I come to this.

"We'll have the best drugs you have, and some flapjacks," he orders, and then adds "and I'm running for President."

Next thing I know the server is under the table sucking off McDougal, I'm smoking PCP out of a Chinese bong, and we have more blueberry pancakes than we need. I offer some (pancakes) to the family sitting next to us and they decline, so I quietly ask the dad if he'll sneak some out to the 80s girl band chained to the axle of our car. He agrees, and I relish the small victories of life.