The McDougal Wiki Vol. 1

How to eat glass

1. Find a large piece of glass (e.g. Grape Nehi Bottle, glass eye from a gypsy, or a windshield off an '83 Buick Elektra)
2. Open your fucking mouth.
3. Insert glass object or bite down on larger piece (if primary glass piece is too large to be eaten in one bite).
4. Chew.
5. Chase with delicious beverage of your choice.
6. Use 100% cotton shop rags or terry cloth in lieu of toilet paper for 4 to 7 days.