Benthamism ad nauseum

*RING*

*RING*

Mmmnnt... Hello?

Hey Jimbo! It's McDougal!

It's three in the morning. And it's Dave, not Jim... bo.

Listen Jimbo, do you have a Roto-Tiller?

A Roto-Tiller?

Yeah, I need to borrow your Roto-Tiller. It's important.

What for?

I just want to borrow it. I'm gonna borrow the crap out of it!

Yeah, see... That's the kind of statement that makes me not want to loan you anything. Ever.

So... You're not gonna let me borrow it?

I don't even know if I have a Roto-Tiller.

You know if you don't let me borrow it I'm just going to come over and steal it anyway.

I know McDougal... I know.

Also, I need your passport, the license plates off your Lexus and your wife's wedding ring. Hey, you're daughter is sixteen now, right Jimbo?

WHAT? What the hell is going on here McDougal?

I'm coming over.

NO! I don't have a Roto-Tiller!

Don't be like that Jimbo. See you in a little bit!

McDougal, I have a gun!

Hey, me too! This is gonna be fun!

*Click*

McDougal! McDougal...? Fuck.