The Quotable McDougal (#5)

"I had to go to Columbus, Ohio one time to give a commencement address at The Ohio State University. That's the way they say it. THE Ohio State University. Pretentious fucks. That's actually how I started my commencement address. Anyway, Columbus is a weird town. Everyone you meet there wants to sell you heroin, but you can't find a single person who will let you swim in their pool."