The McDougal Campaign Tour - Day 21

Campaign Manager's Journal - 9/12/06 - The World Famous Mystery Spot

Last night's September 11th memorial speech drew our largest attendance ever. There must have been fifty people! We hung a giant American flag between the outstretched arms of the pink gorilla, who was positioned directly behind the stage. I think this is what drew the people in...

McDougal drew thunderous applause when he told them that he had personally spent time in Afghanistan "kicking some terrorist ass." However, he followed that with a very graphic description of how he went about extracting information from several captured terrorists and the audience got a bit squeamish. Sometimes I don't think these people know what it is exactly that they want. Still, they definitely took home the message that McDougal is not soft on Homeland Security. They now know he is the type of candidate who will Do Whatever It Takes To Get The Job Done.

Spent today unwinding at the World Famous Mystery Spot. If you've never been there, I highly recommend it. A bored high school girl gives you a "tour" through a tiny shack that is built on the side of a hill, so everything is all slanty. This results in all kinds of crazy optical illusions. Water appears to run uphill, people are able to balance on objects at seemingly impossible angles... You can see me demonstrating the amazing, gravity-defying properties of the World Famous Mystery Spot in the photo above. As you can clearly see, I was able to stand on an ordinary folding ladder that was leaned (in the closed position!) against an ordinary wall (completely unsupported!) and lean out slightly without falling over!!!! Kids, please do not try this at home.

The interns were hoping that the World Famous Mystery Spot would make McDougal come completely unhinged. They were very disappointed when, after watching a ball seemingly roll uphill, McDougal just silently nodded his approval and went back to the bus to take a nap. I explained to them that McDougal is prone to frequent acid flashbacks, so much so that he has begun to find their presence comforting. So while an average person, when confronted with a place where the very laws of physics seem turned upside down, might feel confused and overwhelmed, The World Famous Mystery Spot merely fills McDougal with a sense of well-being and the knowledge that everything is alright in his world.

McDougal's MP3 Playlist:

White Lines - Grandmaster Flash
Fortunate Son - Creedence Clearwater Revival
Highway to Hell - AC/DC
Crazy - Gnarls Barkley
Street Fighting Man - Rolling Stones
Born in the USA - Bruce Springsteen
Ride of the Valkaries - Wagner
Tiny Bubbles - Don Ho