Beating me in the face

This post may be my last. I've lost too much blood. McDougal has composed a joke and cannot log in here directly. When I assured him I didn't know his password, he punched me six times in the face with a tire iron and maybe three more with a brick. I'm having one of those days where I wish I were Reginald Denny. McDougal says:

I have a pet spider monkey that I got for $20 from a homeless guy. His name is Genitals. I don't know the monkey's name.

I have two teeth remaining in the back of my upper right jaw, and one on the bottom. That's not part of the joke. Just giving a quick status report. Wait, McDougal says that is part of the joke.

He has a hot skillet of bacon grease in his hand.